Saturday, July 6, 2013

Move Related Anxiety....

It's almost time for our move!! 

This month a crew of packers will come and pack our house into millions... ok, hundreds of boxes.  The movers will then take all the boxes onto a ridiculously large truck and hopefully deliver them to our new home all in one piece (if we are lucky -- they did break almost everything last time).

The kids know all this is going on and are beginning to get very anxious about the move. I'm not sure who; but, someone told Little Man his stuff was all going on a Big Big Truck...unfortunately, now all I hear about is that Big Big Truck complete with his pouty face. I don't think he really gets it.  Peanut seems to just be oblivious to it all.  But, Gator, poor sweet, lovable Gator....her heart is broken into a million billion trillion pieces. Which means my heart is broken into that many pieces or more! 

We have known about this move for almost a year!  And, we had not really had any big issues or even concerns (from the kids).  I thought today was just another ordinary day and  never have guessed anything was even brewing!  The day was going great since Gator had gymnastics (every day that she has gymnastics is the most wonderful day in the world because it is her happy spot).  She was lucky to score some 1:1 time with her favorite coach and got to work on mastering her roundoff back handspring. I must, must, must get video of this because its pretty darn impressive (as are the new routines)!  She spent a good chunk of time with her teammates and even had Open Gym tonight.  But, she came home in tears.  All that happiness and still tears?!  

Earlier this week a friend of hers from the gymnastics team had her last practice. Their family, also military, is moving this weekend.  All Gator can think about is how we are moving so incredibly soon.  There are only a few more gymnastics practices with these coaches and teammates.  It's not just the gym...its swim, her friends, her room....its everything.

So, what is a Military Momma to do??

Well...I cried.  This isn't supposed to be how our move starts. In fact, I'm going to be honest...I don't really want to move for all the same reasons.  I feel like we finally have some roots.  This is so weird because I haven't felt this way anywhere else. I seriously think I was somehow born in the wrong place...I'm meant to be a Texan.  

Lots of people have said, "It's the military and you will be back..." but, the truth is we may never come back to Texas....ever.  I just don't know where He will lead us.  As much as I love Texas, have a desire to come back here to this very spot and will forever plan, hope and pray that our path leads back here... it may not be the path we are meant to take.  And, if for some reason we did come back...even if we came back in just a mere three years...things would not be the same.

So, tonight, while I held my baby girl on my lap and she cried uncontrollably I told her just how amazing our new journey would be.  She is a lucky one.  She gets to experience things that some children people never have an opportunity to even imagine!  I promised her trips to the zoo, aquarium and local museums.  I promised her new friends and visits with old friends. I promised her the ability to stay in contact her existing friends and coaches.  I told her I was confident she would rock the new swim team and the gymnastics team.  And, even tossed in a small silly promise for material things like a swim cap from our local swim place here so when she swims there she would always remember here.  The easiest thing for me to promise was whenever she was sad or lonely she just had to look to Peanut, Achoo or Baby A.  She never had to worry about being lonely because we would be together. Family.  And, while its sad to leave home...or more or less, this house and what is home today....our new home will be just as awesome because HOME IS WHERE THEY SEND US...where we all are TOGETHER.

Are you struggling with an upcoming move? Read these four suggestions for ways to ease the anxiety of a move.

1.  Become excited (slowly) about your new duty station
I have gathered a lot of information about all the amazing places we will be able to visit.  We have started a new "Bucket List".  We have photos of the new house and a complete layout. The kids are involved in the decisions - what color should we paint this room? They know that the activities they love here are also there....we talk about "when they are on the team in the new location".  

We talk about the friends that we have there! Thankfully, we actually were able to meet up with another homeschool family from HERE that moved there. The kids are looking forward to seeing their friends again when we arrive. It's also known that the military is small...we know SEVERAL other families at our next assignment.  

Oh...and we have an amazing friend who has volunteered to get some photos of the important things for Gator - the gym, the pool, our home, our yard and the water fountains!

2.  Explain exactly what is going on and why
The kids are being kept up to date with what is happening and why. I don't want them to be concerned with why only certain things are being packed away in boxes.  We have a list of several things that we will not let the movers take (photos, baby stuff, electronics).  This way they feel like they know what is happening and when. It makes it a little less scary.

3.  Keep our routines as best we can!
The kids are doing everything here up until the very last moment.  I promised them when we arrive at our next base I will get them involved as quickly we can.  We also are continuing to eat and sleep on the same schedule.  

4.  Listen to the kids!
This is the most important thing!  I need to focus on listening to the kids and their fears.  Any and all of their concerns are valid.  Can you imagine just watching things go on with no explanation? This is a hard thing for the kids so we need to make sure that we listen to how they feel and help them cope as best we can.

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